NaNoWriMo. 44,133.

I’m flagging.

I feel as though I am scraping the barrel.

I was up half the night again last night.

I thought it was the drug dealer’s motorbike going round and round again that woke me (yes, it is that sort of neighbourhood round here), but – it’s very wet today, and I think it must have been heavy rain that woke me, quite a few times.

I tried everything to sleep – good, thick porridge, tea, pain killers, herbal sleeping tablets – the whole arsenal – but nothing was working.

So I wrote for NaNo – handwriting, which I have typed up today.

And I felt as though what I had come up with was filler – and I didn’t want to be getting the word-count through what wasn’t it.

There’s a difference between leaving notes for yourself and just writing a whole load of rubbish in order to start meeting those numbers.

But it’s okay, what I have written – it has led into questions of world-view.

I can use it – and it has advanced the plot, such as it is.